Work Hard, Be Kind, and Never Pay Full Retail: Things My Dad Taught Me

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I recently drove home from a night up at my parents’ house in New Hampshire. Since my son was asleep in the back seat and I know the way home without having to think about it, my mind started to wander. As the oldest daughter, I’ve always looked up to my dad as the epitome of what a father should be. Here are some things he taught me:

Work Hard

My dad has been working in discount retail his entire life, and has been at his current company (probably the largest discount retailer in the world) for close to 30 years. He’s on his feet all day, and at 63 years old, he doesn’t seem to be slowing down. In addition to working a full-time job, he watches my 2-year-old nephew twice a week.

I was always aware of how hard he worked to keep us above water. Even as a little girl, I understood we didn’t have much money. He worked so hard with a full-time job during the day, and for most of my childhood, a part-time job overnight. I’m pretty sure he worked two full-time jobs at times and I don’t know when he slept. As I grew into a teenager, I found jobs at the same stores in which he worked (a cashier at the grocery store and a garden center employee for a large chain) and saw first-hand what his day was like. 

One particular summer between my sophomore and junior years in college, I worked the same schedule as my dad. We drove in together, worked 6 a.m. -3:30 p.m. and ate lunch together every day. We then drove home and I went to the grocery store to work 5-10 p.m. I was so completely exhausted by the end of the day, and I know it sounds trite, but I wouldn’t trade those long days with my dad for anything. He was there in the car on the 30 minute drive to and from Job #1; he was there to share lunches with, chatting about our day; and he was just outside the door on that day when I accidentally flushed my prescription glasses down the toilet during my break. (FYI, don’t wear your sunglasses clipped onto your shirt and then flush an industrial-strength toilet). He offered to buy me a new pair. Obviously, I used my own money for this, as I know he didn’t have extra cash. But that’s my dad: Offering whatever he has to his kids. Which leads me to…

Be Kind

My dad is legit the nicest person I know. He’s one of those people that everyone loves, and most importantly, that everyone respects because that is what he offers to others. My dad has always had some sort of management role at work, whether it be store manager, assistant manager, department manager, or currently support manager. He leads with a quiet authority. He handles challenges (and challenging customers) in such a way that everyone comes out of the situation positively. He doesn’t yell, yet he commands authority. Wherever my dad goes, anywhere in the country, he finds someone who has worked for him. It’s pretty amazing. I’ve met so many of these people while with my dad, and I’ve never heard one negative thing about him. I hope that I’ve gained some of my leadership skills from him. The positivity? Well, I’m still working on that.

Never Pay Full Retail

Since money was always tight in our home, we quickly learned what was a necessity and what wasn’t. I think that’s why all of us kids started working so young. I’ve been buying all of my own clothes and anything that wasn’t an immediate need (which includes any extra snacks I wanted that weren’t on the main household grocery list) since I was 12 years old and had my own babysitting jobs. My siblings and I understood the value of money early on, which I think is sorely lacking in today’s world. 

Even today, I make sure I find the bargains. My dad (and mom) taught us that everything really does go on sale, and there is never really any reason to pay full retail. However, if you are paying full retail, make sure there isn’t a better deal somewhere else (because there usually is). I’m 37 years old, and I’m not sure I can even recall a time when I paid full price for anything. Even now, and even though I know we don’t have to worry as much about our finances as my parents did, I still find the best bargain, and I’m proud of it. My social media friends already know this, but when I find a bargain (even something as simple as green grapes for $.99 a pound), I have to share about it…and the thing inevitably goes out of stock!

From Dad to Papa

In addition to being an all-around good guy, my dad is the best Papa to my kids. I know, even though they don’t see him too often, they’ve inherited many of his good traits. Raising my children not only to be good people, but also productive members of society, is my goal as a parent. And with my dad’s example, I hope I’m doing just that.

Post Script

I wrote the majority of this post two days before Father’s Day. Little did I know that my mom, dad, and my husband had a secret they were keeping from me. I had this overwhelming feeling that I needed to sort through and box up my twins’ old baby clothes for my sister, whose daughter is due in a few months. As I sat on the floor with newly-folded tiny clothing surrounding me, I heard the kitchen slider door opening. When did my husband go outside? I thought. In walks my dad. I was so surprised. He had brought me a cake my mom had made me for my birthday, which was the day after Father’s Day. He took the only day off he had that week to make the 6 hour round trip down from New Hampshire to southern CT to bring me a cake. That’s my dad: Hard working. Kind. Frugal.  

(Photo credit: Robert & Kathleen Photographers)

1 COMMENT

  1. Charity,
    this is so sweet. I lost my dad to brain cancer when I was in graduate School. This gave me goose bumps. You and you kids are so lucky! I love these life lessons. Give him a hug from me! (Sounds so creepy but I have a soft spot in my heart for a good dad since my kids can’t experience my dad).

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