How many pre-pregnancy, expecting, postpartum, the first years, toddler years type books have you read? Although they all provide wonderful bits of information, they leave some important everyday things out! Why didn’t you tell me!?
When I had my first child, I was so much more on edge than with my second. The whole logistics of how, when, and where I was going to shower while I was alone with the baby was stressful. Do you leave them in the crib and bring the monitor in the bathroom or peek out of the shower 100 times in three minutes because you THINK you hear the baby making noise? Maybe bring the bouncer in the bathroom, but if the baby is sleeping, you don’t want to move them, ughh so stressful!
And when do you wash clothes? My laundry room is in the basement. Do I wait only until naptime? Do I leave a screaming kid in a bouncer while I run down quick? In the time I spent overthinking the situation, I could have done 10 things! Why didn’t you tell me!?
Here are some of the funny things I have thought, but no one told me about:
1. Showers are far and few between, QUICK, or at night!
2. You will have a fear of sneezing. #kotexforlife
3. Your hand can quickly become a tissue or a vessel to catch vomit! Picture this: The Hershey Experience Ride, midway through I see it in my daughter’s face, boom, I managed to hold my son in one hand, catch vomit with the other, put it all in a plastic bag from the diaper bag, clean everyone up, and make it off the ride with smiles! Can you imagine the security footage of that debacle! My husband and I are still laughing about this a year later!
4. You laugh at the suggested 7-9 hours of sleep you’re SUPPOSED to be getting to stay balanced and healthy.
5. Wearing, sleeping in, and possibly re-wearing the same outfit to run to the store quickly the next day is okay. I’ve NEVER done this, ok, yes I have!
6. You serve breakfast for dinner and tell the kids it’s so silly and fun when you’re really just buying yourself another day to go grocery shopping!
7. You learn to like lukewarm coffee in the morning.
8. Detangle spray works wonders in hair that has been left up in a bun for 3 days in a row…my friend told me…I brush my hair every day…lie!
9. Never say never! Pre-baby we all think, “I would never be that mom!” Post-baby, if it works, I’m trying it!
10. Going to the store will become an outing even if you don’t need anything!