As my husband was bear hugging my 3 year old tonight so I could trim his dirt-encrusted fingernails I thought “Man, these kids don’t know what they’re missing!” Maybe it’s because they’re boys. Maybe there’s been a miraculous change over the last three decades of my life. Maybe they’ll grow to enjoy some of these and maybe I’ll just get to continue enjoying them on my own. But for now, here are a few things that my kids hate and I love!
1. Getting my fingernails/toenails cut. As previously mentioned, my children are not fans of the nail clippers. Never have been. I’ve resorted to the “clip and peel” method because my time frame is seriously limited. It is the farthest thing from relaxing for all parties involved. I’m a different story though. If I have an hour or two free one afternoon, there’s almost nothing more I would rather do than pay someone to cut my nails, massage my feet, and scrub my calluses. ::sigh:: Think anyone’s open right now?
2. Haircuts. Same sensory stuff involved. Grab the robot toy, open a few lollipops, load a YouTube video and do the damage – quick and dirty. (I almost always need to sneak into bedrooms while they sleep later to fix up some spots). They don’t enjoy it at all! Me? I love a few hours with some trashy magazines having someone massage my scalp and talk nonsense about reality TV or Bruce Jenner’s gender identity. (The unpleasant smell of hair dye is just part of the deal). Plus, there’s something invigorating about a color refresh and feeling an inch or two lighter after your stylist is done. Reminder: call for an appointment first thing tomorrow.
3. Taking baths/showers. Okay, so they are getting slightly better with this but they definitely don’t enjoy it like I do. My older son is slowly learning the relaxation of standing in a hot shower but he’s not quite to the place of, “Which scent bath salts do I want to use tonight?”
4. Naps and bedtime. Most nights there’s just too much for me to do (grade geography quizzes, make tomorrow’s lunches, fold laundry, plan next week’s English lessons) but I would love nothing more than to go to bed at 8pm. My kids always come up with excuses and reasons to stay up because they don’t like sleep. “It’s boring,” says the Kindergartner. One day (maybe not until after college!) they’ll understand.
5. Relaxing on the couch with a good book or movie. To clarify, my younger son is slowly getting better at this but it seems like they’re both always moving. I know that a “body in motion stays in motion” which I rely on to get most of my “ish” done but they take it to the extreme and it’s not productive. I’ve been known to binge on TV series (Homeland, Breaking Bad, Fuller House!) but there’s no 3-6 year old equivalent. Oh well.