Start from within.

By now, we are all so aware of the current climate as it pertains to the ongoing protests in the United States. I am a Black woman, a black mother, a black friend, a black neighbor, a black coworker, and a black entrepreneur.

As the news and social media become populated with the unjust treatment of black Americans and the united efforts of all other races, I take some time to think of how I can help. As a mother and caregiver, my mind goes to our little ones. My daily influence does not only start in my home but the other homes I am grateful enough to be a part of.

When I moved to lower Fairfield County in 2011, family and friends promptly pointed out that I should be wary of the neighborhoods that are more “white,” and coming from Jamaica, I am well aware of classisms. Naively enough, I thought this would be the same thing. After all, this is the United States of America and the 21st century. Surely things have changed. While I have not directly experienced any direct racism, I am well aware of the old Jamaican saying, “Puss and dog no have the same luck.”

I started out in childcare, and the assumption that I was the nanny/babysitter or caregiver would not be wrong. But was it fair for any individual to do so? When I became a mother of a mixed child, I purposefully stayed away from moms’ groups as I knew the judgment that comes with these groups, unless you are lucky enough to find your “tribe.”

Did you ever walk into Whole Foods and wonder what “that” person was doing there? Or if someone was the nanny? Are you guilty of assuming the person at the playground with the young child screaming or person too busy on their phone to pay attention to that child was the nanny? Ask yourself why you assumed that? Was it their culture or color of their skin?

I have been asked why my hair looks like it does or why my skin is brown. No matter the age of the child, my response is to always ask that child the same exact question they asked me. Why do I do this? I believe it is the responsibility of the parent or caregiver to teach their child that there are other people in the world and of different skin color and/or beliefs and not just the ones that you have play dates with.

Do you have books on inclusion? I can say I do not; however, my child is exposed daily to different languages, races, and ethnicities.

I must be honest that during this time, I wonder how many mothers who smile at me are against me, and it does attract an uncomfortable feeling. Is it wrong to think that during this time, if you are not with me, then you are against me?

Have you seen Watchmen? It’s a show on HBO loosely based on a comic and strongly based on an actual event in our history. Check it out – full disclosure: As a woman from the Caribbean, I had no idea that it was based on true events. As I learn, please learn with me of the injustice that has been happening to black people over the years in this land of the free and brave.

I would like to use my voice for good. Tag me on social media {@soniquesays} with any locally owned black businesses I can share to show support. 

Until next time.