I Resolve That 2015 Will Be the Year of…Maybe?!?!

Those who know me well know that big parties and crowds are not really my scene. I am much more comfortable in smaller settings; that I tend to need to recharge after a big activity or weekend of fun; that I spend more time thinking and reading than is probably healthy.  In a word, I am a true homebody.  For example, when I was living smack dab in the middle of midtown Manhattan, nothing sounded more relaxing on a Friday evening than cleaning my apartment and watching some Friday Night TV or renting a movie from the local Blockbuster video store (I am realizing two things right now: (1) I feel old and (2) both of those things are now obsolete, so maybe in hindsight, I was truly living it up!).

When I started dating my now husband, he was famous for always having “Big Plans, Big Plans I Say!” (any Bob Shea fans?).  It was a problem and led us to having “The Talk.”  No, not the one where I tell him I just want to be friends, but the one where I tell him that he and his big plans are sucking the life out of me and can we please just have one weekend where we do NOTHING.  Suffice it to say that I am usually not the one automatically saying yes to plans or activities.

However, a little over a year ago, and perhaps not so coincidentally timed after the birth of my second daughter, I decided that I needed to start seizing the day, living like there was no tomorrow, [insert additional cliches as you see fit] and stop saying no all of the time and, in fact, not only just say yes but actually orchestrate my own Big Plans!  I think there was a little voice in my head telling me that 2014 should be the year of Just Do It!  Except … sometime in the Fall, I was running on empty.  Between some work “emergencies,” my “extracurriculars” and some volunteer projects, there was a several week period of time when I didn’t speak to my husband except to communicate the essentials and, for several months, anyone that came to my office at work started the conversation with “Are you okay?” or “Are you feeling all right?”

After realizing that I could no longer survive as a member of the Walking Dead, I decided that something needed to give, but I also did not want to swing so far back into the realm of always saying no (despite a number of recent movements that this is exactly what you should be doing).  Hence, I have declared 2015 the year of …maybe…and intend to ask myself the following questions before committing to things:

• Is it something that I have to do? – Do I really have a choice to say yes or no?
• If not something that I am required or obligated to do, is it something that I really want to do? – Alternatively, consider if it is something that will absolutely positively impact my life (I’m thinking of work-related activities).
• And, finally, TIME, which requires sub-bullets:
  • How much of a time commitment is it?  – Is it a one time deal or is it something that will require an ongoing commitment?
  • Does it impact anyone else’s time? – Will I need to ask my husband to watch the girls or to ask the nanny to work more hours?
  • Is this the ONLY time this activity/event/opportunity will be available? – Is it a class that I have always wanted to take, but is it offered during another time of the year?
  • Can I make the time? – Note that I did not phrase this question as “Do I have the time?”  None of us have time.  We are all busy.  We all fill our 24 hours.  We might fill it binge watching episodes of Gilmore Girls and Friday Night Lights, which some would argue is a perfectly acceptable and productive use of time, but that might have to get bumped if we choose to do something else.  A good friend of mine always talks about how we all have 24 hours in a day, it is just how we prioritize the things that we do within that 24 hours.

What are you resolving to do during 2015? Anyone else resolving to live a simpler and less “busy” life? Comment below!