This is a letter I wrote to my second baby, four weeks after she was born.
Dear Second Baby,
When I first found out I was pregnant with you, I told your older sister first. She seemed excited. For the next 9 months, I stressed about how your big sister would handle a new baby at home. I didn’t want her to feel left out. I didn’t want her to feel like I loved her less. I worried I didn’t have enough love to spread between the two of you. I found myself forgetting I was pregnant at times, in total denial that you would soon be joining our family.
I was scared.
The morning we went to the hospital, about to finally meet you, I was more worried about how your big sister would handle me being away from her while I was in the hospital than delivering you. I tried to focus on meeting you, but it was difficult for me. Your big sister, for the past 3 years, had been my number one priority. But then, it happened:
I heard you cry.
I saw your face.
I held you close.
I fell in love all over again.
The moment you were born, it felt like life was as it should be. I immediately knew your sister would be okay—better than okay. She would have you as a best friend for life. Out of everything I’ve ever given your sister, you are the best gift. And any fear or anxiety I felt was replaced with absolute love.
You need to know my heart has more than enough love for both of you girls. The day you were born, I became a mom to a second baby. And it’s this second time around. I realize that with each baby, the heart truly does grow.
I love you.
Mama