How to talk so NO ONE will listen

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Want to know how to effectively talk so no one will listen?

  1. Be a Mom. 
  2. Have kids.
  3. Try to do anything that is unrelated to said kids.

Ok. So this is a tongue in cheek post, right? Well, sort of.

Do you ever have the thought: “Why do I even bother speaking?” Or: “Why does anyone bother to ask, if they’re going to do (or act, or say) the opposite?” I do. All. The. Time.

It’s summer break. The kids are out of school. And guess where they are? In your face, all the time. If you’re not at one of the fabulous beaches that Fairfield County has to offer, or on a play date at one of the many options catering to kids in our area, they’re home. With you. All. Day. Long.

I have a four and a half year old boy, and a two and a half year old girl. I will admit, she is worse at listening than he is. But when the moons come together and the stars align: everyone forgets how to listen. Don’t judge me…but I give in…sometimes.

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My daughter, begging for Goldfish at 6 am.

When I’ve been asked 462 times at 6:00 am for goldfish (even though they’ve had breakfast) and I’ve said no 461 times; I give in.

When I’ve been asked 317 times at 4:25 pm for play dough (even though I know it will wreck my carpet) and I’ve said no 316 times; I give in.

Don’t judge me.

I swore I would never be “that mom,” you know…the one who dishes out empty threats and gives in to her kids all the time. And, I’m not. 90% of the time. But guess what – that other 10%? Life happens. I have four clients that I serve through my work-at-home position, and they keep me really busy. I have a husband, and a household, and I have my own stuff that I’m dealing with.

Let’s be honest: It’s hard. It’s overwhelming some days. I know there are days when I lock myself in the bathroom for five minutes just to not be climbed on, and cried to. I know there are moments when I hear “MOMMY!” for the one thousandth time in a day and I want to say, “She’s not here right now!” 

But we can’t say that can we?

As Moms, we don’t get breaks. We’re always on the clock. Whether we work at home, or out of the home. Whether we have help or not. Whether we are sick or healthy, happy or sad. Whether it’s been a bad day at work, or finances are tight, and you have no idea what to make for dinner.

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#SuperheroStatusMom

We’re Moms. We. Are. Superheroes. Say it with me mama…YOU are a superhero.

You are a superhero if your kid ate Nutella straight out of the jar for dinner, why? Because he ate something.

You are a superhero if your kid threw a fit in ShopRite and you waited until you got in the car to cry yourself.

You are a superhero if your kid’s whining (like nails on a chalkboard, if you ask me) hasn’t caused you to send him to his room forever.

We are all superheroes. Regardless of our family size, situation, finances, working status…it doesn’t matter. This job is hard. The employees don’t listen. They are messy, and demanding, and challenging. And there is no human resource handbook for motherhood. We all just do the best we can with what we’ve got.

Here’s the thing. Someone recently reminded me while I was complaining about discussing this very topic that: “At least we have strong boys and girls. They’re not push overs. They’re independent. They will know their mind, and their heart. They won’t follow the crowd.”

Well said. A good reminder that my head strong, independent, and strong-willed child is not just doing this to make me crazy (even though it sure feels that way sometimes).IMG_20160305_072243435

We’re raising kids. Not robots. Kids can be out of control. They can be rude. They can be messy. They’ll drink someone else’s juice box. They will test you. But guess what? They’re kids. That’s how they learn. That’s how they grow. That’s how they figure out that they are in control of their own emotions and choices. That’s how we equip them for a life of success and confidence.

And, the best, most unexpected part? At the end of some of the hardest days I’ve ever had, my son or daughter (sometimes both) will give me unsolicited hugs, kisses, and snuggles and tell me that they love me. That tells me that I’m doing something right. That at the end of the day, LOVE listens. LOVE responds. And LOVE grows.

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Kate M
Kate is a full time Virtual Assistant for a large internet marketer and several smaller entrepreneurs. She spends her VA hours keeping her clients calm and focused while she takes care of all of the back end project management and customer happiness. Most often found with a cup of coffee in hand, she spends many of her VA hours also juggling Mommy hours for her two precocious and high energy kiddos Jax and Brenna. Kate and her family just relocated back to the area from Colorado where they lived for 7 years. A Fairfield County native, Kate is thrilled to be home and sharing some of her own favorite childhood memories and re-living them vicariously through her children.

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