Since becoming a parent, there is a part of my personality that has taken center stage – the “I don’t care what you think about me” part. It truly came to the forefront after I had my second son and really had to get used to a certain level of chaos in my life at all times. This aspect of me has always been alive and well (just ask my mom and any of my siblings..) but since I became a mom, there have been some particularly great highlights.
I am sure I hope that you’ll recognize some of these in yourselves as well…
1. Privacy. Growing up in a house with 6 people and one bathroom, I am used to limited privacy. However, having kids in the house brings entirely new meaning to the word! My experience has been either A) screaming kids and fingers underneath the door begging to be let in or B) curious kids in the bathroom with you wanting to know all about your most intimate bits and parts. Either way, my reaction has mostly been that I am too tired to care. And embarrassment? No. That went out the window with labor and delivery… Let’s just do what we have to do and move on!
2. Free time? What’s that? I have never been good without a schedule. I like when I have stuff to do. If I have ten tasks to do, I can get them all done quickly. But give me just one thing to do in a day and I am a lost cause on the couch preaching about how I “will do it later.” And it doesn’t ever get done. Since having kids around, the tasks I need to get done in one day are immeasurable. So on those rare days when I really don’t have that much to do, panic can sometimes set in! But, I have to say, I am happy when I don’t over schedule my days. It makes me happy to be like, “See? I can relax!” (cue everyone who knows me laughing hysterically).
3. Dinner. OMG…the worst question on Earth – “Mommy, what’s for dinner?” Does that not make you tense up just reading that?! So yes,
sometimes at least once a week I give my kids a “special dinner” that is usually something like scrambled eggs and toast or a PB&J with grapes. Easy peasy. They’ll survive and I don’t stress about it.
4. Sleepiness. The level of tired that you reach and sustain as a parent is unfathomable until you have experienced it for yourself. The rapid aging that has happened to me over the last 6 years of parenting is incredible. On work days I do what I can. I shower, blow dry my hair and put on makeup and real clothes. As good as it gets. On weekends however…I am all about the yoga pants, no make up, and only wash my hair as needed. My neighbors have never seen me look like a put together woman unless they catch me at 7:15am as I am leaving on a work day. And you know what, it’s all good. I am so tired that my weekends have to be about me just relaxing and hanging out. No extra effort needed!
5. Tantrums. That screaming child in the grocery store? He belongs to me. Yes, I see you staring at me either in shock or pity or confusion. And no, I don’t care. I understand that it’s upsetting to hear a kid screaming bloody murder. But, don’t judge. I didn’t hurt him. He has a great life. The reason he’s screaming you ask? Because he wants that toy that he just saw that happens to be placed at his eye level from the cart seat. Yeah. I am not giving into that just so he can be quiet. He needs to learn how to hear the word “no” and not get every single thing he asks for. I am doing my best to keep it together, teach my kid a lesson, keep track of my older child who is three steps ahead of me and oh yeah, pick up my groceries. That being said, if it gets really bad – I am not afraid to ditch my full cart in the middle of the store and just head back to the car. Gotta do what you gotta do!
7. Attitude. Sarcasm and sassiness make me laugh. From my 3-year-old? Still funny to me. Yes, we risk the kids saying things in front of their teachers and friends. But my husband and I love laughing with our boys and sassy sarcasm is how we roll. If sassiness doesn’t tip over into disrespect, I am good with it. Plus, it makes for fun parent-teacher conferences and nobody makes me laugh like my boys do!
Can you relate? What things are you saying “whatever” to as a mom? What part of your personality has started to shine since you became a parent?